me, writing, throwing commas around like i’ve just won the lottery and i’m exulting in my winnings, needlessly, passionately, with no thought to the consequences,
honestly missionaries are evil. the idea of traveling the world to tell people Who Didnt Fucking Ask that their beliefs are wrong in the hopes that theyll adopt your beliefs seems sinister
idk what it is about kids these days that makes them so funny but in any case my friend just told us about how her younger sister babysits for a 7 and 9 yr old and one day they said they wanted to play “bus drivers” and they made wheels and everything but then the game was just being bus drivers at a union meeting discussing their problems
the most obnoxious part of the holiday season is commercials that try to sound like ‘Twas The Night Before Christmas and have a dinky xylophone playing in the background while the narrator tells you in rhyme to buy a Ford
If Congress does not pass legislation protecting the tribe and the legal challenge fails, the Mashpee would be stripped of their right to exercise sovereign jurisdiction over their land.
Jessie Little Doe Baird, the tribe’s vice-chairwoman, told Al Jazeera that loss of jurisdiction would prevent the tribe from running indigenous language schools, tribal courts, and housing projects, as well as its own police.
“We have our own police force, which is important because they’re tribal citizens and since we’ve had our own police force, none of our men have been beaten or shot, which we’ve had before with non-tribal police,” she said.
ok but can we like start a petition for Cards Against Humanity to make a John Mulaney themed pack because i would be willing to spend all my money on that
Suggestions:
Black cards-
• THERES A ______ LOOSE! IN THE HOSPITAL
• Eat ass, suck a dick, and sell ________
• Canceling plans is like ________
• Do my friends hate me? Or do I just need _____
• You have the moral backbone of a _______
• I’ll keep all of my ___________ right here and the one day I’ll die
White Cards-
• what’s new pussycat played 7 times followed by its not unusual followed by what’s new pussy cat
• smoking cocaine the night before your college graduation
• a 28 year old healthy man trying his best
• one black coffee
• STREET SMARTS
• shushing animals even though they’ve never spoken
• Delta Airlines
• the one thing they can’t replace
• an on fire garbage can… could be a nursery
• a sea of drunk toddlers
• a pre- y2k asshole
• Xanax
Do my friends hate me? Or do I just needwhat’s new pussycat played 7 followed by it’s not unusual followed by what’s new pussycat
Eat ass, suck a dick, and sell the one thing they can’t replace.
THERE’S a sea of drunk toddlers LOOSE! IN THE HOSPITAL
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