Personally? I think once someone is in the 15/16/17 range it’s a little late to be going “kids will be kids” as an excuse for them being bullies and bigots and that you shouldn’t let them get away with it.
I mean it might just be me but I kind of think we should be teaching kids that these things are unacceptable instead of letting it slide and then being shocked and angry when at 18/19/20/whatever they don’t know any better?
Hey, maybe I’m wrong. But when I was being bullied, I was constantly given reasons why the bullies were totally justified in their behavior, and as a surprise to no one, it never stopped. I was suicidal by 4th grade and in therapy by 8th, and still they kept going until I moved.
And when I moved, I was bullied by new people, and again, people kept shrugging it off or trying to justify it, and no one took it seriously because they were “just kids” and “how much damage could kids really do to one another?” Well I was just a kid too. But supposedly they “wouldn’t have done it if I hadn’t provoked them in some way” so it was my responsibility to fix it by fixing myself and making myself someone they wouldn’t want to target.
I just kinda think someone should have taught these kids better before they became adults? I think they should have heard that bullying is wrong at least once? Don’t you think someone should have said something to them instead of trying to justify it?
And I don’t see why it’s wrong for an adult to step up and say, “Hey kid, your behavior is hurtful and this is why.” I don’t see why people see that as a bad thing or why they think it’s better to just keep quiet because it’s “no big deal” and “they’re just being a kid.”
Like why is it wrong to tell someone who is 17 to stop being a bully or a bigot but once they’re 18 they should just magically know better? I don’t get it.
People on this site call it harassment, but what the hell do you think bullying someone or being a raging bigot is? A party? Why is it okay if a kid does it? It shouldn’t be okay for anyone to do it.
But hey. Maybe that’s just me.
❄💙 Bella 💙❄
yeah like, seriously as someone who was bullied in middle school in horrifying ways, including sending a bunch of 11th graders after a 5 ft tall 7th grader to follow him almost home after school; including threatening to kick him while he’s sitting down, and then actually kicking him while he’s sitting down; threatening to kill him; throwing rocks and other objects at him; etc, etc, and who after finally cracking and telling a teacher he’s scared of some of his classmates heard time and time again from teachers that PROMISED they’d help anyone that came forward with bullying accusations that they “didn’t mean to” and that it was “just a misunderstanding” and “that’s just how teenagers are.”
so yeah no lol you don’t get to be a bully online just because you’re 16 i literally don’t care
Controversial opinion maybe but honestly? No age is appropriate to dismiss bullying and bigoted behaviour as “kids will be kids”. Little kids get it if you actually bother to tell them it’s wrong. It’s far easier to nip this shit in the bud when they are just picking it up than to fix ingrained behaviour. You don’t even have to tell them off or punish them if they are genuinely too young to know better, just inform them. Kids want to be good.
^^^^ Yeah like??? “Kids will be kids” is just “boys will be boys” all over again; if you don’t teach them at a young age then they’ll never learn? So I really don’t feel kids of any age should be given a free pass on any of this shit? I mean obviously don’t be mean to them but is telling someone “hey that behavior is wrong and this is why” being mean? I don’t think so.
Once they’re an adult and this is all they know it’s going to be much harder to teach them better so like, yeah I think when they are kids that is a good time to intervene?
I really don’t get why this is seen as a controversial or offensive idea. If someone starts harassing me online or insulting me I think I have a right to let them know why what they are doing is wrong regardless of how old they are? Because if they are doing it to me they could easily do it to someone else, maybe someone weaker and more afraid? So like, someone ought to stop it?
❄💙 Bella 💙❄
I realize this might come off like I’m saying someone at 13 should know the same things and have the same level of maturity as someone who is 18. I don’t believe that at all.
But I do believe that if you see someone being victimized by someone, and you can step in, you should. If you’re being victimized by someone, you should be allowed to stand up for yourself. If you see someone being a bigot or a bully, you should make it clear what’s wrong with their behavior. If someone is a bigot or a bully, they should be educated and called out. And I believe that is true no matter what ages are involved in this.
Like, yeah, be nice to kids. Be understanding towards kids. Be respectful. Don’t expect perfection. Don’t be cruel or demanding.
But if someone is calling you slurs or telling you to die or sending hundreds of people to attack you or explaining why you don’t deserve to be treated like a human… you can’t just shrug it off, say “kids will be kids,” and give them a free pass?
They won’t learn from that. They won’t become better people from that. They won’t change their ways if they never learn how to change or even that they should change.
Is it possible they’ll grow out of it and become nicer on their own? Maybe.
But more than likely, they won’t learn to not be a bigot if they’re never told they are one and no one explains why what they are doing is bigoted. They won’t stop bullying people if they believe they can get away with it or think their victim deserves it.
(Adults can be bullies, by the way. That doesn’t end in childhood.)
So I’d rather someone say, “Hey, no one deserves this, and this is why.” Maybe they won’t listen. But they will listen to excuses we make for their behavior and use that against others.
I have absolutely seen minors on this site respond to callouts with “I’m a minor shut up.” They absolutely think they can get away with any kind of horrible behavior they want because they are a minor. They think their age justifies what they are doing and makes it acceptable, maybe even good.
I wonder why. 🤔
❄💙 Bella 💙❄
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