idiopathicsmile:

idiopathicsmile:

“That well-dressed fellow in the corner? We call him the Gentleman Thief. Why, just last year, he single-handedly stole more than 40 gentlemen.”

people frequently tag this post with like ~sexy roguish dudes but like.

for the record, when i wrote it i was definitely just picturing a criminal who has a cave someplace where he stashes like dozens and dozens of monopoly man-looking motherfuckers, just stacked up in a pile, monocles rattling against other monocles in indignation

i kind of love that it’s been hijacked by fandom, though? like i accidentally spoke a language i myself did not realize i was speaking

the nerdiest parseltongue